ADMIRER TALKS BACK
The March issue of BENT included
a BENT/Disgaytalk Forum titled Admirers:
Devotees, Pretenders, Wannabees, and . . . Race. We present
the unedited response below without comment.
Hello, First let me state that
I am neither gay neither disabled. I am what one calls an "amputee
devotee", and also the editor of the OverGround website, which
you might have heard of. I have read the recent article about
admirers in Bent which I found very interesting and enlightening
in many aspects.
There is one element
that I wanted to say though, because this is often the source of
an understandable confusion: amputee devotees are not amputation
fetishists. Fetishists, as it is correctly stated in the article,
is someone who is sexualy, and sexualy only, attracted to an inanimate
object (prosthesis, braces, wheelchair,...) or part of the body
objectified (stump, polio legs,...), while devotees are sexualy,
but not only, attracted to a person with a disability, because the
fact that the person is disabled makes him or her extra-special.
Devotees are not
interested in having sex with an object but want to share their
life with someone who is disabled. There are, of course, amputation
(and other disability) fetishists, and I wont deny that, but they
are not devotees. Also, I will not say that the stump is of zero
interest to an amputee devotee, but that would be no less and no
more than any other part of the body that is deemed erotic when
sex is at the menu. While for the amputation fetishist, the stump
is the only focus in a sexual relationship, and the person to whom
it belongs is of little interest.
Therefor, I understand
that amputees are quite reluctant to engage in a relationship with
a devotee, thinking that he might be a fetishist. This confusion
is to my opinion the source of most misunderstandings between people
with disabilities and devotees. On last thing: devotees are rarely
pretenders; wannabes are often pretenders; some devotees are wannabes
but not often and many wannabes are not devotees.
This being said,
I will agree with one who says that devotees, wannabes and pretenders
are all variants of the same syndrome: "Body Integrity Identity
Disorder", which in turn, could be a form of "Gender Identity Disorder",
although this has never been corroborated by professionals (so far).
for more information.
us know what you think of this BENT feature.