finding our way with your help.
Let us know what
you like or don't like.
Let us know what you'd like to see.
LAST CONFESSION: Sister Boom-Boom.
is good for the
You'll feel a whole lot better.
I especially liked "Unzipping the Monster Dick" in BENT's March
issue. My son struggles with the whole penis issue on a regular
basis (he's straight). He is convinced that it's part of his whole
image as a man. I wish he could see the tyranny of that whole
idea! I'm thinking that that silly attitude holds straight guys
hostage as much as gays. And women, too, for that matter! And
I loved the article on not "telling". Lord I am so tired of folks
who think that their sexuality is any of my business. I don't
care who does who (as long as I am not subjected to a lot of breeder
fantasies) and every one is clearly and fully consenting. We have
to have our pioneers who are willing to get in folks' faces and
I applaud them. But for those of us who prefer not to even bring
our sexuality up, .well, there needs to be a place for us also.
Somewhere in the middle. Thanks for all the BENT contributors'
hard work. As always, it's a pleasure.
Some past letters
I really appreciated the article
on depression. So much, in fact, that I so very much want
to share it by posting onto a discussion forum board of a disability
website I am part of. The Depression Support Group could really
benefit from it as I have.
I am a disability advocate for an Independent Living Center In
North Central Idaho. I am not a gay man so that puts me at a disadvantage,
but I have lived with major depression off and on since my childhood
so I do understand disability. I'm 51 now. and yeah, I'm bent.
Thanks heavans for that. Introductions aside, BENT gives me a
chance to learn about a segment of our population that I might
not otherwise come into contact with. Sure I have gay friends,
but we don't have enough population around here to readily identify
"gay/disabled." Someday though, someone's going to show up
at my office with a story they need to tell and I'd like to think
that reading BENT has given me at least an inkling of how to listen,
be aware, be helpful is some way. It probably takes a lot of work
to put a webzine together and if you decide you can't do it anymore,
most of us are going to understand. But take with you the fact
that you've made an impact on one disability advocate in the semi-outback
of Idaho. Yeah, it matters
Sheer chance got me to Mike Shumate's story, My
First Orgy. As a T12 para, I was very interested. I've had
little sexual and, growing older, erections don't happen
though personal contact & pills might help. I figure I'm over
the hill (with little action on the way up), but Shumate's refences
to older men are an encouragement. Thanks for the graphic writing.
It's Sunday morning. I've had my 1st cup of coffee and decided
to catch up with a week's worth of neglected e-mail. A friend
e-mailed me Larry Connolly's The
Worst Husband in San Francisco . Although I often raise my
literary guard when I come across a piece with a confessional
tone, this work found the chink in my armor. Connolly's wit combined
with his brutally honest depiction of two strong-willed people
fumbling (in the very best and most honorable sense of the word)
their way through married life would be worth reading no matter
what the particulars of that married life may be. The accompanying
art serves as a not so subtle reminder that we ARE the superheroes
in the graphic novels of our lives. I want to read more!
Max Verga helped out more than one person with Escaping
Homegrown Paternalism. If I get any lonelier cooped up in
this small town in my mother's house, I may just go mad. But then
again there is the huge financial burden that has only gotten
so much worse in these past years. Someday, though.
Larry Connolly (The
Worst Husband in San Francisco) has the courage to speak the
unspeakable and to do it with such wit. The anger is refreshingbut
even more impressive is this: the disabled would rarely choose
their condition, but caregivers do choose theirs. "Wither thou
goest, I will go. Wither thou lodgest, I will lodge.Thy people
shall be my people." Connolly has told a love story older than
Genesis but a lot funnier.
I volunteer at the Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Youth Project in
Halifax, Nova Scotia. We provide support services and social services
for LGBT youth 25 and under. We also offer different resource/information
packages for gay men, women, transgendered people, and parents
of gay children. Recently I've gotten a call to see if we had
anything on being gay and disabled and I realized we had very,
very little. So, knowing we need this fixed, I went on a web search
and found books on amazon.com and a few small articles on the
internet. And then I was directed to your website and I was so,
so glad I was. BENT is fantastic, I couldn't have asked for a
better resource to pass on to others. I wanted to thank you for
your wonderful webzine; it will definitely be advertised in our
packages as a place to access for gay and disabled persons, not
only youth but adults as well. Best regards and many thanks.
I cannot tell you how much Altered
States made me think. I am just starting to date a man who
became an amputee four years ago. John Killacky's article made
me think about where my friend has been and where we have to go
in the future! Thanks so very much!
Hello, First let me state that I am neither gay neither disabled.
I am what one calls an "amputee devotee", and also the editor
of the OverGround website, which you might have heard of. I have
read the recent article about admirers in Bent which I found very
interesting and enlightening in many aspects.
(Read the complete
text of this letter.)
I am 18 years old and my right arm is half paralyzed by something
called brachial plexic palsy, caused at birth. I don't see it
as a disability anymore, rather an obstacle that God placed before
me to overcome. I am at Ball State University in Muncie Indiana
where I am following my dream of becoming a Special Education
Teacher. I am the VP of a campus GLBT group called Spectrum, where
I'm planning a meeting on the "crippled" GLBT community and how
we need to embrace them like everyone else. My group is not familiar
with my arm, something I am disclosing at this meeting, which
may hit them closer to home. I will use stories from BENT to open
up the discussion. I just wanted to say that your webzine is great
and helped me with things I have ignored for years.